Pomegranatey

11/3/11

This is so weird. I was just looking back at all of my old posts about us and how confused I was and how much you liked me. I can’t believe that it’s only been a year. We’ve grown so much. We are completely different people but we still remained close all along the way up until recently. Recently, maybe about two weeks ago on sunday we had a phone call about how us is now completely over for a while. We haven’t talked on the phone, we haven’t hung out, we have barely conversed in school. You told me that you wanted to have a committed relationship with Eleanor Harvey and that you have lost all interest in me and you really sounded like you didn’t care about me anymore. Knowing that it had only been 10 days since we hung out before that phone call still confuzzles me. That one monday we hung out with Elysa and Emmet might have been one of the best days of my life (Except that you hooked up with Eleanor that morning. The day could have don without that.) It was the day after I slept over at your house when me, you, jack, and bridgette all got fucked up and played beer pong which was the most fun game in the world and made me realize how much i like making out. actually, that saturday,sunday, and monday were the best combined three days of my life. that monday, riding back from physical therapy we said we loved each other which seemed the actual first time we ever said it since before we were drunk and basically having sex. you told me to ride closer to you on our bikes and you kissed me by surprise which may have been the hands down sweetest thing in the world. 

yatayatayata

Simon I miss you a lot. I hate being cut off from someone I know so well and love talking to more than anyone else. I have a ridiculous amount of admiration for you and everything that you do and everything about you. I admit that I wish flow would be better between us. I wish that you did always want to be around me and thought that I was hilarious and we were best friends at the same time as having an attraction to each other. I honestly don’t care if the attraction completely disappeared I just wish that you would enjoy talking to me as much as I enjoy talking to you. I wish that we could be best friends, we don’t need to hook up, or flirt or anything. We could just smoke weed and cuddle and go do stupid shit and not do anything at all together. I don’t fucking know. I just want you to stay close to me but of course its not fucking mutual NOTHING IS EVER FUCKING MUTUAL 

in a perfect world we will fall in love in peoria and stay in love until both of us decided not to be in love with each other anymore

I miss you so much and I wish you missed me 

btdubs you can’t be committed to someone and hook up with someone even if they don’t know each other. that’s the point of being COMMITTED. if the main girl knows that it’s not a committed relationship, the go ahead, have a freshman ho suck your dick.